Adventist
Blues
by Brad MacIntyre
This poem/lyric was read at
a school chapel at La Sierra Academy.
Its authorship date is prior to 1979.
Now
I don't drink and I don't swear
I
don't take dope or have long hair,
I
go to church each week. Oh yes, I do.
I
never eat before going to bed,
I'll
drink a glass of juice instead,
And
jog each day at least a mile or two.
Now
all my life I've been pretty good,
I've
always done just what I should,
My
parents were missionaries over seas.
I
got all "A's" in Bible class
And
studied hard so I could pass,
And
even bought my books from the ABC's
(The Adventist Book Center)
I
know my memory verse each week,
And
when called upon can always speak;
I'm
never at a loss for words you see.
Cause
I've been educated at Andrews U
And
Loma Linda and Oakwood too
I've
even done my time at C.U.C.
Now
I've been taught to keep the law.
You
don't goof up or have a flaw
Lest
we embarrass dear old Mom and Dad.
No,
you don't wear jeans, you don't wear slacks.
You
can't eat this, you can't eat that--
Rules,
Rules, Rules are all I ever had.
I
never listen to Rock and Roll.
or
watch T.V. or even bowl,
And
I'm a vegetarian all the way.
And
of course I pay a faithful tithe
And
give my offerings on the side
When
when they have a potluck at church -
I always stay
(Yum
Yum! - love that cottage cheese loaf!)
And
when each November rolls around
I
grab my can and hit the town
for
the Church's World-wide Services Appeal
And
of course you know I never fail
To
buy my food from Collegedale
If
you buy it by the case, you get quite a deal.
(Especially during Camp Meeting.)
I'll
never drink a Coca Cola;
On
Thursdays I make my own granola,
I
give my clothes to Dorcas when they get to tight.
At
Wednesday night meeting, I'm always there
And
remember my neighbor in a special prayer
And
last Summer I bought all the books by Sister White!
(of course, they're still in their
wrappers,
but they're there.)
I
study my lesson every day,
And
when I find the time, I try to pray.
But,
I don't want to get fanatical, you know?
In
fact, I've just become a Master Guide.
And
I know all the words to "Side by Side"--
I
mean - How much higher can a mere mortal go?!
(Side by side we stand....)
And
when I get confused about what to do,
I
pick up the Old Advent Review
And
get all the answers in plain old black and white.
'Cause
I'm a busy man, and it's absurd.
To
spend hours and hours reading the Word,
And
I trust our publications to be right.
Yes,
I've found the church where I belong -
Why!
I don't think I've done anything wrong
For
at least two years, or maybe it's been three.
I
know I'm walking in the light.
Sometimes
I'm bored, but that's all right.
Because
there's a crown in heaven just for me.
(At least that's what they told me in
Cradle Roll.)
But
recently I've head some talk.
They
say I need a closer walk
With
Jesus. If I'll only let Him in.
Well,
I'm all for that -- I'll give it a try,
Although
I often wonder "Why?"
And
ask myself -- "Just where does He fit in?"
